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To make it clear

14K views 97 replies 39 participants last post by  taureandragon76 
#1 ·
I got a pm this morning by one of the mods, seems like some members have been complaining of me getting free stuff. I just want everybody to know that everything i get i do keep, i also give stuff away and i sell too and i do buy a lot. I only reply on free stuff that i know i can use, i dont take if i dont need it.
This upset me a big deal cause people dont know anything about me to b judging me, i think there is a lot of people here that needs to grow up and stop crying cause u were slow enough no to get something free. I have always work something out when i got another member asking me to share split or what ever. I just want to thank all the members that have given me stuff and that i have bought from too, I also want to say sorry to the people i was going to grab FREE stuff from but for obvious reasons i decided not to take it anymore as this pm really got me.
 
#2 ·
Im sorry to hear this Claudia and I wish I could say something to make you feel better. If someone is giving away something for free, and you are the first to chime up - then sobeit!! If that person decides to give the stuff to you - then thats their decision!!!

For those who have issues about this, they either need to be more on the ball with posting to that person..or if its a "thats not fair" issue...then unfortunately some growing up needs to be done i think..

I find more and more that people have less compassion for others and dont think before speaking which is very hurtful. We are not all in a position that has a two income salary, has all the money in the world and thats why we gravatate towards things that are free or cheap. And for those who want to help others by giving away, thats awesome..so who it goes to - well who really cares..??

For those who have complained, I am quite disgusted really. We all love the hobby, and sometimes it can be very expensive. If we choose to look for free things, which I am always looking..why should that be critisized and tattle tailed on..

Im curious..did you get in trouble by the mod? I think this needs to be addressed in this open forum as I would like to hear what kind of trouble we will get into if we decide to post on the free stuff constantly..






JMO..
 
#3 ·
I can speak to the fact that Claudia gives away and does just as much for other memebers. She has given me many free items, and I have also seen many times where she has went out of her way to pick things up and deliver for other members.
 
#5 ·
Dont worry Claudia, keep on as you have been doing and try to put this aside and not think about it - i know it will be hard for a few days, but we all dont think like this. I am still quite dismayed that this needed to be handled this way though..(through a PM from a mod)..
 
#6 ·
I don't understand why anyone would care. It's my business who and how I give away my stuff to. Just because we're all on the same forum doesn't mean I have to offer to everyone. If I were you, I would just ignore it and continue whatever you are doing, Claudia. I mean, maybe I should post up a thread saying that I am going to offer you some free stuff just to see what happens?

In this world, there are always going to be complainers. If you heeded all of them, you'd be spending all your days pleasing other people and not yourself or the ones who matter to you.
 
#8 ·
Is also the way that things were said in the pm, i have nothing against the mod but it did hurt.
This is what i got...

Friendly suggestion...
Would you mind laying off on snapping up all the freebies posted on BCA? It's starting to annoy a lot of people (who then complain to us mods) & giving you a negative rep as a cheapskate who only wants free stuff all the time.

It's not a big deal but just letting you know that this "habit" of grabbing everything free offered here whether you actually need it or will use it is something frequently brought up (and not in a good way). I've noticed that people even "joke" about "where's Claudia" as soon as something free is posted since everyone knows you'll be swooping in to grab the free stuff, regardless of what it is. It may sound like good natured joking around, but having a rep as the BCA cheapskate is not really a great rep to have.

Sorry to be such a downer.

This is what i wrote back....
When i get something is because i need it or cause i could use it, i dont get stuff just cause is free, many times i have seen free stuff and i dont take it cause i dont need it. As for people complaining tell them to come to me, no one have an idea of my situation, i got asalted by my husband in novemeber 5 days later i got surgery, we almost didnt have a place to stay for xmas as i didnt have the money to pay rent i got so sick cause of stress and now i am living with 1700 a month doing everything by myself with my 3 kids so when i see soemthing free i take it and i also buy. I dont take a reputation as cheap or anything like that i have seen it as fast typer or something like that but oh well. I am gonna stop writing cause this is upsetting me and i am crying while typing.
 
#31 · (Edited)
Is also the way that things were said in the pm, i have nothing against the mod but it did hurt.
This is what i got...

Friendly suggestion...
Would you mind laying off on snapping up all the freebies posted on BCA? It's starting to annoy a lot of people (who then complain to us mods) & giving you a negative rep as a cheapskate who only wants free stuff all the time.

It's not a big deal but just letting you know that this "habit" of grabbing everything free offered here whether you actually need it or will use it is something frequently brought up (and not in a good way). I've noticed that people even "joke" about "where's Claudia" as soon as something free is posted since everyone knows you'll be swooping in to grab the free stuff, regardless of what it is. It may sound like good natured joking around, but having a rep as the BCA cheapskate is not really a great rep to have.

Sorry to be such a downer.

This is what i wrote back....
When i get something is because i need it or cause i could use it, i dont get stuff just cause is free, many times i have seen free stuff and i dont take it cause i dont need it. As for people complaining tell them to come to me, no one have an idea of my situation, i got asalted by my husband in novemeber 5 days later i got surgery, we almost didnt have a place to stay for xmas as i didnt have the money to pay rent i got so sick cause of stress and now i am living with 1700 a month doing everything by myself with my 3 kids so when i see soemthing free i take it and i also buy. I dont take a reputation as cheap or anything like that i have seen it as fast typer or something like that but oh well. I am gonna stop writing cause this is upsetting me and i am crying while typing.
This is truly the most ridiculous comment I have heard on here.

If the stuff is free and you are the first to ask for it, then so long as the person giving it away is still willing to give it to you, its yours.

If others have issues with it, they can be the first to respond or maybe send the person giving the stuff away a pm explaining why they might have special circumstances why they really need it and can't afford it.

As for the number of postings for stuff being given away vs stuff received, that dosen't work. I have given away lots of stuff through pm and not through posting.

If a moderator's job is to "police" who gets free stuff on here then the process should be that no one can give away stuff, its donated to the site and the mods decide on their own who to give it away to. If that isn't the idea of the e-mail to Claudia telling her to back off, then all those who are complaining need to grow up and either come on this site more or go buy the stuff.

I don't think I have ever seen a post from Claudia selling something that she has got for free, which is more than you can say for one person who I gave some plants away too a few years ago who then posted it up for sale on the site the next day!! If Claudia had been first then, I would still be posting on here giving stuff away for free instead of doing it through pm's, only to people I know or that other people I trust on here know.

In all the time I have been on this site, this is truly the most disappointing and disheartening thread I have read on here and it makes me wonder whether to come on here anymore :eek:
 
#12 ·
Wow, that sucks. If its posted as free, as has been said, its first come first served. I don't know you personally yet, but from seeing you on the forum I have formed a good opinion of you. Anyone who gets upset because they missed out on a FREE item needs to grow up a little. Sorry you got burned for being an active member of the forum.
 
#13 ·











as a member of the forum I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE ABOVE!! It is not because she got free stuff when I wanted it. It is because I think it should be spread around more so that all people get a chance at free stuff.

Since BCAquaria's new inception Claudia you have not posted ONE For Free item in the classifieds. So I'd say its a bit slanted towards you taking more than giving. You are not the only one on a fixed single income on these boards, and thus again, I feel it should be more shared.

As a mod I know the pm was a meant to be a gentle request to take MOST of the free things, rather share...

As a community member I know people feel obligated to give to the first person who PM's and you are right, they could choose not to, but at the cost of what? favouritism accusations? Pm's asking why they have not heard back when so and so pm'd first?

It is divisive of Claudia to post this publicly and as such, there will be people on both sides of the fence...

Claudia, do you want it to continue? I think you are a really neat lady, who while I do not know you very well, I respect as a large contributor to our community & forum, both for your knowledge, spirit, and sense of fun. I do not wish you to feel bashed, picked upon or singled out...

I, meaning just myself speaking here, do want you to be less of a tiger on the free stuff and share it more... No judgement included...
 
#78 ·
I am just curious to know if this is the moderator that slamed Claudia.. If it is , its an obvious abuse of power ,, sounds pretty childish to.. gees all those on craigs list I wonder if you would'nt mind not hogging all the free stuff... Power to you Claudia.. I personally know that you are the type of person that gives back what you can.
On a personal note.. if its listed for free then its up for grabs.
 
#14 ·
Awww. so sorry members are complaining. It isnt your fault you need the items. Like ben wrote you get their first so the item is all yours. People how can you blame Claudia when she needs the items and she has the skills of a ninja to ask first. Claudia, its okay dont let other members get to you, u are a great person.

Feel Better,
Brian
 
#17 ·
It is unbelievable.
i for one know Claudia and have seen her go out of her way to help others as well as myself.
for some one to complain she gets only free stuff is insulting and degrading.
and agree with the question of why do the mods even care?
they as well as most others know this forum works on a first come first serve basis....
 
#18 ·
To make it fair to everyone then, perhaps there should be no free stuff allowed in the classifieds. If it's free, there is a minimum charge, which is a donation to BCA. Then everyone wins right and we have a standing donation to BCA.
 
#19 ·
i have to say - this is rediculous..and if ibenu feels a need to embarrass and humiliate someone on this forum, i think thats sad, and very unprofessional. Your a mod and you are to be taking care of this forum. You are now picking on someone and feeling you are entitled to say this because you have the power to do so. That is not a mod as far as I am concerned. Could you please pick out all my pms' (which I know you can do) and all my messages to those who have had free stuff or trades..and let me know if I belong still on this forum? If i am banned I will gladly go, because i do not want to be part of a forum that outright bashes someone for something like this. We allllll give away and receive free stuff...isnt that WHAT this forum is all about - helping others? Please..help me to understand...
 
#20 ·
I have given free stuf, just cause i dont post it doesnt mean anything. I have help many people here, i have gone out of my way to pick stuff up for other members, i have help so many but i am not the type that i write oh i did this and i did that and yes i want this to continue cause i am blame for getting free stuff when sometimes no one wants them and memebrs are begging for somebody to take it
 
#22 ·
Dont worry i dont need to get banned for telling what i think and for complaining on something think is not right i will go myself but i will say what i think cause i have freedom of speach
 
#23 ·
Don't leave the forum, it would be our loss. Just ignore it and go about your business. Even if the item was for sale and you were snapping them up it shouldn't be an issue, nevermind when they are free.

I have a feeling all this is going to do is split the forum, as those who feel Claudia has done nothing wrong will just offer their free stuff to her first, then post it if she doesn't want it. I know I will do that whenever I have free stuff from now on.
 
#24 ·
For the record some free stuff has been taken when i actually get respnd from pms so i dont really get everything
 
#26 ·
you dont need to justify yourself claudia..really..i think most people on here who know you are shaking their heads to this whole thing. I think the mods need to have a talk amongst themselves to figure this all out. To come down on you was wrong, and we all know that. :)

Now... im waiting for my PM :)
 
#59 ·
you dont need to justify yourself claudia..really..i think most people on here who know you are shaking their heads to this whole thing. I think the mods need to have a talk amongst themselves to figure this all out. To come down on you was wrong, and we all know that. :)
I could not agree more, and to help put this matter to rest I wanted to chime in about my experiences with you. I don't know if you remember this anymore Claudia, but back in Feb. of this year when I joined the board you were one of the first to greet me as well as offer FREE items (like moss for my crayfish which just hatched eggs) and GREAT ADVICE to help me get started.

You offered this to a complete stranger, which says much more than enough about your character. IMOO it's this sincere generosity that took this community to this level in the first place.

I hope that this BAD JUDGEMENT call begets some type of apology at the very least.
 
#27 ·
Wow
The flavor of the forum sure has changed a lot recently, & definitely not for the good.
Claudia, I can't believe you would even be called out on this.
If the others don't spend as much time on here & miss out, too fricken bad!!
1st come 1st served. Free or not it shouldn't matter.
Used to love the integrity of the forum with the 1st to respond getting 1st chance. Not always the case now. OBO seems to mean members trying to outbid each other to get the item being listed. What happened to 1st to respond gets 1st kick at the can??? I guess we're turning into CL, Yay!!!! :rolleyes: Sorry didn't mean to rant on another new trend developing on the forum.
Good for you Claudia or should I say "Quickdraw Mcgraw"!!! LOL
No complaints from my end, cept you're awfully quick my dear!!
To those complaining, maybe spend a little more time on the forum & increase your chances of seeing the free deals 1st. That's the way it works.
I guess some folks just need Drama :rolleyes:
Sorry to hear this is happening to you Claudia.
Your always in good standing as far as I'm concerned. :)
Cheers!!!!
 
#28 ·
Oh no i dont want anybody splitting but i think this is a little bit stupid and really hurt me, I only have my income which is not much but i try to b still in the hobby as is something i do for myself. I dont apreciate people telling me what to do with the stuff i get either, (just got another pm) is the way things are say in the pm i guess but oh well. I will not take anything for free anymore and if anybody needs a list of stuff oi have done or gave away well let me know, i dont usually tell people what i do to help other people but if is necesary i will pm the info i guess
 
#29 ·
Since I have been also ranting - i also want to make a note that if anyone else was treated like this that I am sure this same convo amongst members would have happened..

the entire situation is uncalled for - regardless of who it is about..
 
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